20 years ago life was easier. 20 years ago when you were meeting the person you didn’t ask the questions like: does he/she want to be in a relationship with me or he/she just wanna sleep with me or he/she wants smth else?
Yes, for sure, womanizers have existed in all centuries, no doubts about it. Nevertheless, that time people didn’t have internet: the evil of universe, the one that is given us vaccination against love at the very beginning of our path. They couldn’t know about each other so much: they needed to spend time together to figure out do they fit or not. Moreover, there was not so much freedom: the girl that got one night stand was called a slut, while now if you tell that you slept with some random guy after a club, nobody will blame you much.
This freedom of info, freedom of actions are treated like a good phenomenon. But are you sure about? With Snapchat and WhatsApp we forgot how to talk with people: we don’t know how to express our feelings. We are free, but we are scared. We can technically call person and talk, but we are saying that we will better just send him a snap and then waiting for the magic answer that probably will not be a serious answer and turn to stupid joke or even you can receive a meme.
We are scared to feel. With this digital freedom, we are getting drama constantly: this one wrote, this guy snapped, this one tagged in the comments- we are falling in love constantly and breaking our hearts constantly and then going like a wounded zombie around trying to find another victim that will make us suffer and we will make him/her suffer. It’s easier like this: not to feel deep, but just to feel yourself alive.
We are persuading ourselves that each of our drama is “real”. We want to be loved, but we do nothing to be.
20 years ago people didn’t get divorced after each of the difficult situation. 20 years ago people were fighting for each other. They also had problems(not ones “he didn’t put the relationship status on Facebook”), but they knew that once you chose a person, you should do all possible and impossible to maintain your connection.
People also were jealous. Nevertheless, they didn’t chase any guy/girl that were writing the comments of the photos of their loved ones. They didn’t check: what Snapchat smile does this girl have? Oh, it’s yellow heart so they are best friends, so he doesn’t love me anymore?
People didn’t make fast decisions, didn’t follow their friends’ advice so much: one day of 0 WhatsApp messages and that’s it, we broke up; oh, I will send my friends printscreens of our conversation and they will tell me what to answer to him.
People knew how to talk: they didn’t hide under the warm blanket of their past. They didn’t hide under the messages on Facebook and didn’t answer to the messages just as they are too cool to do it. They didn’t decide to text somebody just because they are bored: they just didn’t have this opportunity to change the time of the meeting hundreds of times per day. When somebody promised to meet next Friday at 6 there, they couldn’t text your Friday morning and said: You know I am not feeling like going.
Technologies are freedom: we got a lot of opportunities with them. But with these millions of opportunities, we forgot about the main things. We don’t need a lot: just to be cuddled in the evening after long working day; just to have a person nearby to watch a movie when its raining outside, just to hear “good morning, my little girl” when you are just waking up. But our fears of being vulnerable, fears of losing all the possibilities that we have, make us lonely.
Are you vaccinated against love as well?