Have you sometimes caught yourself on the thought that u r regretting smth? Smth that has happened, smth that you haven’t prevented, smth that you could but haven’t done because of some reason? Have you thought ” what would be if”? Have you even been blue and asked yourself : “whyyyyy?why I have done it????”
I think everybody was doing it. Every person is making mistakes. Every person has good and bad times. And it is definitely understandable why every human being when the desperate times are coming, is trying to think about this ” second future”, about how his life will turn out if he would not have done or would have done something.
These thoughts are warming us while they are also making us feel worse. They are like sweet poison: you are drinking it happily before aftertaste will come and kill you. With every dip into this unreality, you are going down and down, down and down. Some people can actually live their lives at this bottom: they are protecting themselves from the reality and living in these pinkie dreams without facing what is really happening at the point of their nose.
The principle “no regrets” is really popular one. There are millions of posts on instagram and fb where people are trying to persuade their followers that they are not regretting anything. They are showing off that they are so cool, poker faces and easy going and that’s nothing is bothering them. They seem so self-confident that even knowing about the existence of this unreal Instagram curtain, you will start hesitating: maybe they are really like this? just doing and fine no matter what?
The truth is that these people that are never regretting are not existing. They are not robots, they are humans. They can say whatever, but it is impossible to be such a wall all the time. They got at least once a situation when somewhere deep in their souls, they have started hesitating. They have started swimming in this “second-possible future” and this worm was eating them from inside.
To live with “no regrets” attitude is super difficult. It means that when you are making decision, there is no way back. You can’t make this step back in your mind and enjoy this sweet hell. No. You are accepting no matter what it is. You are accepting any shit that has happened and trying to continue your life.
Sometimes we are really into this principle. But not because we are facing the reality, just because we are escaping it. We are so tired of everything: work, studying, healthy eating, gym, expectations from everybody, too complicated relationship. We are so tired that using this principle to go crazy. Everybody has its own way: going for random trip, get drunk, get high, eat some junk food, go shopping and etc. But that’s not the way when this principal is working for good: it’s the example when we are using it as an excuse to forget about our problems for a while.
To live like this on the constant basis it is super difficult. It is a lot of work of self talk and moreover a lot of positive attitude should be involved. You should face yourself, admit who you are, admit that everything that is happening, is happening for better. Sometimes you are thinking that it is impossible. You are thinking: damn, i lost such a chance, my life would be perfect right now. But think: what would you loose if u would take this chance? Maybe u would not have this and this happy moments, would never meet these people, never try this…. All your events are so connected with one another: you will never know where you will loose, where you will get.
So, when next time you will have this thought ” what would be”, stop yourself. Say to yourself: that’s already hasn’t happened, I need to live here and right now. Maybe reality sucks, but that’s how it is. The faster you will face it, the faster you will figure out how to live here, the faster you will find the way to solve your problems.
So what are you waiting for?:)